A Mother Blessing is similar to a baby shower but instead of the women in your Village celebrating your baby by showering them in gifts, they celebrate you and your transition from maiden to mother and instead of playing games, you practise beautiful rituals. A Mother Blessing is inspired by a sacred Navajo ceremony, called a Blessingway but as a sign of respect, we call it a Mother Blessing or a Baby Blessing.
Here’s my Step- By- Step Guide to Planning Your Virtual Mother Blessing:
4- 6 WEEKS IN ADVANCE
1. Choose Your Organiser/ Host
Ask your mother, sister or best friend to help you plan your Mother Blessing and to be the Facilitator (Host). If you’d prefer to organise it yourself, at least let her be the Virtual Facilitator so you can relax on the day and be showered in love and support.
2. Set a Date
Any time between 32- 38 weeks is an ideal time to have your Mother Blessing.
3. Choose a “Venue”
Your virtual “venue” will depend on the number of guests and the duration of your Mother Blessing. Skype allows up to 50 people and unlimited time, Zoom allows up to 100 guests but only 40 minutes on a free account (100 people and 24 hours on a Pro plan), Facetime allows up to 32 devices and Google Hangouts allows you to see 10 people at once.
4. Create a Guest List
Add to your guest list all the women in your life who love and support you including your grandmother, mother, sisters and best girl friends.
5. Decide on a Theme
Anything positive and uplighting that relates to motherhood for example, Matrescence,The Joys of Motherhood or Motherly Love.
6. Decide How You’d Like to Decorate
You may like to invite your guests to attend your Mother Blessing in a special room in their house or backyard, to set their table with special items like flowers from their garden, to diffuse a particular essential oil blend and use the cutlery and crockery they save for special occasions. You could ask your Host to send or drop off a Care Package to your guests before the event with a special candle, an essential oil blend, flowers and anything you’d like them to use to decorate their space.
7. Consider Gifts
Traditionally at a Mother Blessing, guests create an artwork, do some craft or create a keepsake for you to have with you during birth or for your fourth trimester. It’s challenging virtually, but here’s a few ideas:
- Create a Playlist: on Spotify for your birth, share it with your guests and ask them to each add a song that reminds them of you. At your Mother Blessing have them explain why they chose this song for you.
- Organise a Meal Train:for the first 6 weeks after birth: You can create a meal sign- up sheet and assign days and meals to your guests using Meal Train. At your Mother Blessing have your guests tell you what they’re going to make and why they’ve chosen this special dish. After birth, leave an esky on your doorstep for your ‘Village’ to leave meals. Have them text you or your partner to let you know it’s there. If any of your guests don’t cook or consider themselves a good cook, they can organise home delivery from their favourite restaurant and tell you why they think you’ll like it too.
- Create a Virtual Doula Fund
Instead of gifts, ask your guests to contribute money (Crowdfund) towards a Virtual Postpartum Doula. Postpartum Doulas aren’t doing in- home support due to social distancing but some are offering their services virtually. They may offer support via facetime, zoom, on the phone or text. Postpartum Doulas can help you plan your postpartum, provide emotional support, help with feeding or sleeping issues with your baby, meal plan or help you be the mother you want to be.
8. Choose the Food
Choose a meal and treats and share the recipes with your guests and have them prepare them so you can enjoy together. Include the links to your recipes on the invite.
9. Send out the invites
Personalise your invite, send them free via text, email or a shareable link, track RSVPs, send messages to your guests and include a link to your virtual Mother Blessing using evite. You can invite your guests to Crowdfund for your Virtual Postpartum Doula on your evite.
P.S Include links to recipes and the details of your gift choice on your invite.
2- 3 WEEKS IN ADVANCE
10. Plan 2- 3 activities for your Mother Blessing. Here’s some ideas:
- Send each guest a candle and have them light it at your Mother Blessing, share a blessing or a few words about what she wishes for you and then you can blow them all out together. When you start labouring at home, have your birth partner send a message to your ‘Village’ to light their candles so everyone is thinking of you and sending you love.
- Write a Letter, Poem or story to you and read it to you at your Mother Blessing. Ask them to post them to you afterwards (or email them to the host who can print them out for you) so you can read them anytime you need a reminder that you have a village of women who love and support you on your motherhood journey.
There are plenty more ideas for activities online.
A WEEK IN ADVANCE
11. Plan your Mother Blessing
Create a rough order of events for your Mother Blessing. It should have an opening, middle and a closing. For example;
Opening: ask each guest to introduce herself, “I’m (name), daughter of (her mother), granddaughter of (her grandmothers).” This honours those who came before us and the matrilineal nature of birth.
Middle: present their gifts (as outlined above) and do your chosen activities.
Closing: sing a song, read a poem or quote or do a meditation together.
12. Have a practise run on your “venue” of choice with your host so you’re confident with the technology.
THE DAY BEFORE
13. Send your guests a reminder via evite and include instructions on how to access and use the Virtual Venue.
ON THE DAY
14. When guests “arrive”
The host explains to the guests what they can expect and will ensure everyone knows how to turn on their camera or mute/ unmute themselves and how to use the chat box. Arrange for the host to press “Record” so you can keep a recording of your Virtual Mother Blessing as a reminder of the love and support of your Village.
After you’ve done the closing for your Mother Blessing, enjoy your food and drink together and chat freely.
If you’d like me to organise your Mother Blessing in Milton, please get in touch HERE
I’m a fully qualified and experienced Women’s Circle Facilitator and can tailor your Mother Blessing to your unique needs.
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